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She may not like sex. Or she may not like having it with you. Or worse, she might think that all she's actually required to do is be present. As hard as it may be to believe, there are women who think that lying there amounts to participation. Sad perspective, isn't it?



Fix it: You have to say something. Ask her if she feels desired by your actions; if she says she does, then tell her you would like to feel that way too. If you're too shy to communicate verbally about this ordeal, then tell her that you'd like to role-play and switch positions. Let her be you and you be her. Her body language will almost certainly change. Problem solved -- orgasms for everyone.



She acts like a guy

Okay, so this might be a gross generalization, but she might do things like orgasm and want to come to a screeching halt and not let you touch her after it's over or forego foreplay entirely.



Possible reasons: I don't see the problem... Just kidding. Everyone has differing desires when it comes to the realm of sex, so rather than judge her, find out what's behind the behavior. She may prefer straight-up sex with no frills or she may simply place more importance on her own orgasm than on yours.



Fix it: If you want foreplay, then seduce her. If you want to ensure that you orgasm as well, ask her if she's satisfied; if she says yes, then tell her you want to feel just as good as she does.



She hides her body

So, your girl is acting like a nun and won't get naked in front of you. As much as you want to enjoy her body visually, she leaves the room by slowly backing out. Or, she needs to have all the lights off when you have sex and the blankets need to be covering her. Let's break that habit.



Possible reasons: Well, there's no doubt that she's insecure about her body, and she thinks you might get turned off if you see all her flaws.



Fix it: Show her that even though you have flaws, you know that she loves you anyway -- but don't point your flaws. Perhaps the most important thing is to tell her that you think she's beautiful and that you appreciate her body. It could take time a repetition on your part to break down those walls that she has constructed, but it'll be worth it once you do.



She never reciprocates

You go down on her and take your time, making sure to please her in every way possible, but she never goes down on you. You seduce her constantly, doing your best to turn her on and make her enjoy the sex, and yet she never comes on to you or initiates sex.



Possible reasons: First, it's possible she thinks that it's your responsibility to turn her on, and not the other way around. Second, some women think that guys get turned on just by seeing a girl, so therefore she doesn't really have to come on to you. Oddly enough, some women even think that being "aggressive" is unladylike and could turn a guy off.



Fix it: Tell her that you love receiving oral sex and you fantasize about how great she would be at it. Tell her that it's important for you to feel desired and that she can show you by coming onto you every now and again. That ought to do it -- empathy is a great thing.

make it workSex as you must know by now (because I've written about it ad nauseam) is just as important as trust, love and all that other good stuff. If you and your girl aren't on the same sexual wavelength, chances are things aren't going to suddenly change.



Dare to discuss it. Ask her what she thinks about sex, how important it is to her, and how often she'd like to engage in it. If her responses are way off from what you'd expect, then you might want to reconsider opting to spend the majority of your time with her.
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